How do you manage a Louisville divorce with a difficult spouse? Your spouse may have a personality disorder, such as narcissism, borderline personality disorder, or bi-polar disorder. You may have tried everything from counseling to couples retreats to honest conversations about ending the marriage. Your spouse doesn’t want a divorce, and you can’t continue the marriage. What are you supposed to do?
3 Important Takeaways About How to Manage a Louisville Divorce with a Difficult Spouse:
- Many people have faced a difficult divorce scenario where they have tried every option to resolve existing issues including counseling.
- The cost of a divorce, as well as the time the process will take to complete are both tied to the level of disagreement between you and your spouse, and your ability to ultimately work through these challenges to reach agreement (or have a decision imposed by the Judge in your case).
- One of the keys when develop strategies for how to manage a Louisville divorce with a difficult spouse involves a strategy for strategic communication. How and when you communicate, as well as the tone and substance of those communications can and will have a significant impact on success.
The first and most important thing to know is you aren’t alone in this experience. Many spouses resist the reality of an ending marriage and facing the reality of a divorce. The range of emotions they proffer is as diverse as their reasons for disagreeing with the divorce. There is a way forward, and it is crucial to plan and manage each step carefully.
The one unavoidable reality about ending a marriage is the cost of divorce, and the time it takes to finish the divorce process will be the direct result of the number of areas in which you disagree and your ability to work through these challenges and find a way to resolve them.
The Judge in your case cannot grant a divorce until every issue in the Separation Agreement is completely resolved.
So, what are some proven strategies for managing a Louisville divorce with a difficult spouse? First, manage every communication carefully and strategically. Know your objective from the outset, and don’t allow yourself to be drawn into any sort of confrontation. If a text string or email exchange is heating up, acknowledge that it would be better to suspend the conversation for now and resume it when emotions have passed. Keep a calm tone and communicate clearly at all times.
Handle things in small steps. Don’t try to take on too many things at once. Talk to your spouse about how things could work in the future. For example, if you have children, a constant theme might be: “Our ability to continue to communicate respectfully and in at least a neutral tone will make this much easier for our children.” Yes, it’s hard for a child to understand and accept the idea of a divorce. However, it is much harder for a child to process the coming changes, whether logically or emotionally, when Mom and Dad are constantly having heated exchanges.
Plant the seeds of mediation. Mediation is a private, confidential strategy that keeps your personal business out of the public record. It is also an environment that is specifically designed to prevent controlling behavior and heated exchanges. The mediator will work with you, your spouse, and your counsel to identify potential alternatives and resolve any areas of disagreement.
Finally, one of the most important things to consider as you manage a Louisville divorce with a difficult spouse is your own health and well-being. It is vital to have a close support group of family and friends, and to consider professional counseling to support you on this journey. The divorce and family law attorneys at Dodd & Dodd have decades of experience in these types of cases. We help you to develop and implement proven strategies to manage each step of the process and provide insight and guidance on communications and negotiations.
We invite you to review the strong recommendations of our former clients and the legal industry and contact Dodd & Dodd or call 502-584-1108 to schedule an appointment with one of our attorneys.




